Having watched the movie ‘the adjustment buearu’ I can see the correlations of that movie and Islam, in life and God. We have limited free will, which I take to mean that God has a set plan for us but we can choose to follow His plan or not. The movie suggests likewise but that when we are irresponsible with our free will, it will be taken from us and our ‘plan’ of life will be set. The paths leading to career success and love will be pre-determined. Is real life also a series of paths? Did life take me on this journey of parenthood and marriage? I worry at times if my depression or negative perception is because I should be on a different path or that I;m not satisfied with my path chosen by Allah. I worry about unworthiness and being lost, feeling lost.
Perhaps like in the movie I need to rethink what fulfills me, tune into my triggers of happiness. Damon’s character though politics filled him but it wasn’t the case/ his love interest was willing to forgo career happiness for love. I grew up believing the college and career path would fulfill me but it hasn’t. So I need to adjust my perception, look deeper at who I am and not hold back. I yearn to feel more free and loose but hold back so much out of fear of embarrassment and failure, of being rejected and of disappointing- God, myself, my family. What if I lived like ‘no one was watching?’ like a famous person who didn’t fear paparazzi at every turn. What if I absorbed my faith’s teachings without the connotations of ‘bad’ and ‘rules’ but just as a guide on the path of happiness?
I want to let go and (truly) let God
